Surprises & Fireworks

Oct 26, 2013

Caught Julia sleep walking last night, looking out the window. I slept better but woke early feeling incredibly angry, playing out scenes of shouting at hospital staff - not sure how helpful that would be.

I go downstairs and kitten therapy works wonders! Merlin is a needy little thing in the morning, he keeps stopping me writing this on the ipad - some things are simply more important, it seems! I re read Julia’s post from yesterday it’s great, I’m so proud of my wonderful wife and I know that this blog will give us strength in the coming months.

It’s little ruggers day for Felix, I take Imogen along so Julia can rest up - she’s got batteries to charge. I feel bad but I ignore the other parents that I usually speak to, I can’t face the usual chit chat today. I left the ipad at home so Imogen and I sit and read the paper in the school canteen whilst Felix plays rugby.

Suddenly, I’m ambushed by a sad story about a photographer documenting his wife’s journey with breast cancer. Tears fill my eyes, it’s the last thing I was expecting, someone has documented my worse fear. I have to remind myself all cancers are different, Julia is strong and we are getting the best care possible. Imogen doesn’t see it and I quickly turn the page and the conversation brightens. It seems cancer is everywhere at the moment, tv campaigns, movember, in the papers. I’m hypersensitive now.

Felix enjoyed little ruggers and we head home via the supermarket. I start to reply to the kind messages from work mates, I tell Imogen to get ready for dance class and off she goes. Suddenly I notice the time, I shout Imogen, she comes downstairs in her normal clothes! This makes me laugh, she has been faffing again! A quick change on the stairs and we just make it to the class on time.

In the afternoon, Imogen and I clean out the smelly gerbils and do some planting in the garden. I cook enchiladas for dinner, Julia and I love them, Imogen is ambivalent, Felix decides with his eyes we are trying poison him. Lots of threats about not going to the fireworks gets him to eat it. Julia talked about having to save money and eat healthy to the kids this morning. They both agreed but being presented enchiladas on the same day is simply too much!

It’s firework night at the school, there’s someone killing the guitar and doing tenacious d covers when we arrive, I grab the beer and we chat to friends. The kids go on some tumble dryer style ride - I’m terrified for them. Felix looked panicky at the start and they are being rolled into big kids, I expect tears but they both come off beaming “Awesome!” Imogen lost her hat in the excitement and has to fight through the queue to get it back.

More beers and friends arrive. It’s so great to see them, Julia and I notice the differences in how friends (the dads) handle the situation, that’s ok it’s big bad news. We quickly break the ice and the conversation soon starts flowing. It all feels wonderfully normal, the kids all sit to watch the fireworks together “oooing”, “arrhhhing” and sometimes screaming together. The display was great and we head home tired and happy.

Today was a good day.

R x